Category Archives: Television

Doctor Who Serial X – Shada

Part One

Wow, this opening is wonderful. “SHADA!” I’ve never seen “Shada” before, so this should be a romp, or it will be terrible. Tom is having a ridiculous soliloquy. I wonder how much of this is going to be Tom Baker talking to himself.

Oh, we get opening credits!

Sleeping with your buddies is fun… More fun when you’re all sleeping around a ball on a glowing pyramid.

Is that Robert Webb? That dude looks a lot like Robert Webb. OH MY GOD! EVERYONE OTHER THAN ROBERT WEBB IS DOING A LITTLE SEAT DANCE!

Professor Chronotis? I’m guessing this guy is a time traveller.

He pulls a book fresh out of a bag from purchasing it, and starts it in the middle? It’s HG Wells’ The Time Machine. So he’s obviously a time traveller.

Damn, Robert Webb. I love your outfit!

There’s a LOT more footage than I expected. Tom Baker just had a quick interjection and it was his first one in 13 minutes.

I want Robert Webb’s outfit, SO MUCH!

Romana just said “I had it when I was a Time Tot.” Time Tot!!!! Why hasn’t NuWho ever used that phrase?

Part Two

I’m now learning that there’s a newer animated reconstruction.

“What’s that thing you strain ice with?” Why would you strain ice? Is he being eccentric or is the past weird?

OH NO! He has a bag of ball!

Beware the spheres! The Toclafane?

“You will give me everything in your mind”

The sphere is chasing the Doctor. This show really loves extremely slow chases.

Part Three

British guy fishing seems to be the most British a fisher could possibly be.

If you knock and no one answers, you don’t just go in. C’mon lady, he could be in the buff.

It’s a cloaked Klingon Bird of Prey. Captain Kirk and co. stole it, brought it back to the 20th century, parked it, and are out looking for new whales.

Yikes, that might be the worst chromakey I’ve ever seen.

“I let the sphere believe I was stupid.” That is total Doctor Who, fool electronics by pretending to be dumb.

Part Four

Let’s keep this going! This is gonna be great!

There’s too much exposition provided by Tom Baker to make this interesting to watch, but finally we have an actual scene. They’re using the sphere to read the Doctor’s mind again? This is what’s wrong with classic Who. They try a plot point and then do it again, because the stories are just plainly too long.

Part Five

I sometimes watch Doctor Who and wonder why they’re doing something and what they’re trying to achieve, and not sure if the actors or screenwriters even know. Like the opening scene, the Doctor is falling towards the monster, it swings its arm and attacks the Doctor in slow motion. Why was the Doctor going to get in position to be hit? What were the stage directions?

I forgot Robert Webb was in this.

None of my Doctor Who blog posts make any sense whatsoever.

Director: Okay, I want you to exit this room in such a way that is extremely awkward. Make sure that you don’t show what’s behind the door.

Part Six

“I burst through the nearest door.” He really did burst through that door. Good describing, Tom Baker.

This episode has a lot more narration than the rest of the serial, but that’s not surprising.

I love Douglas Adams, but he was wrong to think that watching two people try to hold levers is interesting.

Doctor Who Serial 107 – Nightmare of Eden

Part One

I’m loving this jaunty tune, perhaps the best piece of soundtrack from Doctor Who.

That co-pilot is an asshole. Thank farts the Doctor just arrived. I forgot that K9’s voice is wrong. It’s been some time since I watched some classic Doctor Who. Took November and December off from Doctor Who, it was well needed.

Uh oh, the Doctor chose a bad cover.

Co-pilot is a drug-runner!

Part Two

They really need to work on their monsters. These are so ridiculously bad.

Wait! Is the Doctor chasing an Elvis impersonator? Shit, I think he is. It’s a train full of Elvis impersonators!

The cops fell for the oldest trick in the book!

Part Three

I get to watch the cops falling for the oldest trick in the book again. It’s just as enjoyable the second time.

The piano soundtrack, however, is less enjoyable. It feels like an old silent movie.

That plant looks like a vulva.

I like the Roger McGuinn sunglasses that the scientist wears. He’s less cool than Roger McGuinn.

If an actor flubs their line, do another take, c’mon Doctor Who!

“It’s a perfectly ordinary electric dog.”

“If you see the Doctor, or his lady companion, kill them!” LADY COMPANION!

Part Four

Romana’s a naughty bitch. She’s gonna touch the controls, even if the copper is telling her not to.

K9 referring to the Doctor as “the Master” is confusing. They have another character named the Master!

The companion of the scientist reminds me of Ace.

Is anyone else watching Little America on AppleTV+? It’s quite good. Only two episodes in so far.

I didn’t notice how many sequins the cops are wearing.

The Mandrels are adorable!!

The Doctor is the pied piper of Mandrels.

Doctor Who Serial 106 – The Creature from the Pit

Part One

Yes! Ritualistic murder.

K9’s voice is horrible.

I like Romana being his “Commander.” Yes, ma’am!

Aww, their murder is done by democracy.

I like the engineers.

Part Two

I like the pet plants attacking K9.

Hahaha, the Doctor pulling out a book on climbing Everest, it being in Tibet, then pulling out a book to teach yourself Tibetan… all while hanging on a cliff-face. That might be the best joke in the series so far… all 17 seasons.

So much slapping in this season of Doctor Who.

The creature from the pit looks like a penis.

I like the Nostradamus hanging out in the pit.

I expected her to shout “Tin dog! Bad boy!”

K9’s new voice actor always sounds really sad. He’s not Marvin.

Hi-ho, hi-ho, into the pit we go…

Part Three

Aww the Doctor is communicating telepathically with the penis puppet. Now he’s putting the penis part of the puppet in his mouth and shouting “I am friend.”

Part Four

The lady is terrible! She’s cruel.

Death by weed.

Haha! He said aluminum is the silly British way.

I think I need a Doctor Who break, so I’m going to binge BoJack Horseman season 6 part one before I watch some more.

Doctor Who Serial 105 – City of Death

Part One

They’re doing some really loud construction in my building at 8am. They didn’t tell us about this. This is annoying. It’s my day off. Ugh.

This alien is made up of a pile of worms, I think.

This ad for Paris seems a bit weird. Also, the Doctor and Romana need to stop jaywalking.

They’re in a time loop.

This is probably the most expensive Doctor Who episode until the 1990s.

There’s gonna be a heist.

I don’t know what the professor’s accident is supposed to be, but he sounds like Natasha from Rocky & Bullwinkle. “Moose and squirrel.”

That shot through the postcard stand is the most inventive camera work in Doctor Who history, and it could’ve worked if the stand didn’t wobble, but it is Doctor Who.

Oh yeah! I’m right. It’s a heist.

Part Two

Yay! Wormface’s Human mask is incredible.

Mmm, chicken.

They’re deflecting the laser beams, and by doing that, interrupting them with the wall. Yet it doesn’t set off the alarm.

Boom! He’s a time traveler!

Part Three

I love villains who provide exposition before killing the hero.

I love the Doctor mesmerizing the guard with a polaroid picture. Though the tap on the chin is confusing. How did that knock the guy out?

Nice kimono.

This is the most melodramatic that Doctor Who has ever been.

I feel like Romana is forgotten in this story.

Part Four

We have to watch the professor’s death again. It was so long and bad.

So wormface married a human face.

What a fantastic show of love, you give your wife a bracelet that lets you murder her.

Hello John Cleese! That was lovely.

Doctor Who Serial 104 – Destiny of the Daleks

Part One

Really? That’s how they regenerate Romana. She just chooses her body and wants to be Adria? No reasoning for why she was dying?

“Well, it’s not a flying saucer.” No, Doctor, it’s a flying cone.

Those mop wigs are horrendous.

Second Romana kinda reminds me of Jodie Whittaker, except 12 years old.

They’re on Skaro, who would’ve thought that would happen in an episode titled “Destiny of the Daleks.”

Part Two

I’m kinda glad this is a four part episode, the six parters drag.

DAMN! That was the best Dalek intro in the series yet, crashing through the glass was incredible. Yes! Go Terry Nation!

The effect was a bit minimized by the “glass” waving in the wind.

Interesting that the Daleks are using humanoid slaves when they have machines that would do the job. They just like subjugating humanoids. I like this idea.

Part Three

Davros should take the cobwebs off himself.

“We’ll meet again, never doubt it. We’ll meet again.”

She’s a ro-bit!

Part Four

So the robots are fighting the Daleks, and the Daleks realize that they’re in an infinite battle of similar wills because computers are computers, and they’re all doing the same thing. That doesn’t make sense. The Daleks are organic. They’re not machines, just housed in a machine.

The amount of time this episode has wasted playing Rock, Paper, Scissors is overkill.

Doctor Who Serial 103 – The Key To Time Parts 21-26: The Armageddon Factor

Part One

Here we are, the final story of the season. The end of Romana I, the end of the key to time.

it starts with the worst chromakey I’ve seen on this show.

The roof caves in, “it’s alright it’s alright.” Could they be more British?

It’s nuclear war on Adria. Is that the name of the country?

I bet the bad guys are gone. Looks like I’m right.

The princess looks like a 12 year old.

Poor K9. He doesn’t seem right and the Doctor klonks him on the nose.

I think the Marshall is the Black Guardian.

K9 is a good doggie.

Part Two

Well, I’m wrong about who the Black Guardian is.

That door can barely hold back the Doctor. I don’t think it could hold back radiation.

K9 is going to melt!!!

YAY! K9 is okay.

“Resistance is useless.” Star Trek really ratchetted this up a notch.

That skull of jell-o does not look tasty.

via GIPHY

Part Three

Goopy skull is an idiot. The Marshall’s a bigger idiot.

Shit’s gettin’ real.

K9 is getting some real sass. I appreciate that.

Part Four

He’s trying to create his own segment of the key? If it’s that easy to manufacture, they Time Lords could just make one!

Astra is totally the Black Guardian.

Part Five

Astra still looks 12. Isn’t she and the Doctor gonna get hitched in real life. I just Googled and she’s like 28 at this point. Her Wikipedia photo was taken in 2014 and she still looks 12.

Wait, according to Wikipedia, she’s going to play Romana??? What???

Just kidding, I knew that.

I like Drax, this blue collar Time Lord. “I thought somebody knicked it.”

Part Six

Haha, tiny Doctor.

Bugger, villain has the key to time

Tiny Doctor and Drax jumping out of K9 is tight.

Doctor Who Serial 102 – The Key To Time Parts 17-20: The Power Of Kroll

Part One

HAHAHA That hoverboat in the sped up film is hilarious.

Companions… always getting kidnapped. You’d think that after the last story Romana would be more careful.

More canoeing, but these guys don’t know how to canoe. J-Stroke!

The green people in loincloths are going to flash Romana by accident.

Doctor Who has a hard-on for colonialism.

Part Two

Gah, the portrayal of the aboriginal peoples of this planet is horrific.

Kroll is amazing.

Killing your enemy’s god is a bad idea.

You’d never hear on Star Trek a crew member reply to a call to the bridge with, “NOW???” What a whiney asshole.

Part Three

Kroll’s power comes from the Key To Time… *gasp*.

via GIPHY

“I’m counting 30 tentacles on one side alone.”

via GIPHY

Wait. The Doctor can emit a terrible high pitched sound from his mouth? That is the weirdest addition to canon.

Wow, they really need a lesson in canoeing.

Part Four

Wow, the Doctor doesn’t give a shit about anyone but him dying.

Why is Kroll attacking the indigenous people and not the Doctor and Romana. They’re in a boat. They’re moving.

Doctor Who Serial 101 – The Key To Time Parts 13-16: The Androids of Tara

Part One

Doctor Who should spend more time in the Doctor’s wardrobe.

Wow, that outfit is horrific. I love purple, but I don’t love whatever that is.

Romana is being stalked. I assume by a wild animal. Maybe the beast’s prey is naturally a disgusting purple?

Hahaha! The beast is like the cross between a sloth, monkey, and a man in a gorilla suit.

This knight is a creepy dude who wants to bone Romana.

“Do what I say, or I shall have you flogged,” I think she wants him to flog her.

Part Two

Why does that bed have a human shaped cut out? Where the comfy material is where the human isn’t.

“I once showed her my courtesy.” He means his penis.

It seems the key to time is impenetrable.

“Peasants! How dare you lay hands on a lady?” Maybe this is why you have problems with an uprising?

Haha! The clockwork moves so unsmoothly.

Part Three

There are three Romanas! This is confusing.

Wait, four Romanas?

They should teach lockpicking in Time Lord school. She seems to have figured it out, though.

So many androids in this episode and none are as cool as Data.

Why does everyone in Doctor Who have Stormtrooper aim?

Stop being an asshole to your pet dog, Doctor.

Wow they rescue Romana and capture her in two minutes.

Part Four

It’s time for a wedding!

via GIPHY

I’m jealous of the Doctor, he’s canoeing, and I’m not.

Except the king is marrying his sister. Gross.

This is the tamest sword fight I’ve ever seen.

Doctor Who Serial 100 – The Key To Time Parts 9-12: The Stones of Blood

Part One

That’s nice, the Doctor admitted that Earth is his favourite planet.

I like this old lady who can’t remember any dates.

The crow looks evil because crows are evil.

Not one of these people seems not evil.

Part Two

It’s a Time Lord sacrifice, not a Human sacrifice.

Wow, that old lady can’t remember a single line of hers.

Part Three

That feather outfit is extraordinary as old lady said.

The old lady’s acting reminds me of William Hartnell, aka, bad.

Part Four

I feel that Vivan’s outfit was designed just so someone could paint her boobs silver.

Haha! The Doctor’s wig is brilliant.

Doctor Who Serial 099 – The Key To Time Parts 5-8: The Pirate Planet

Part One

Oh! This is the first one written by Douglas Adams!

This guy looks like Phil Spector.

I like Romana stealing the Doctor’s jelly babies.

These guards are worse shots than storm troopers.

Part Two

That robot falcon is amazing.

That air car looks a lot like a landspeeder from Star Wars.

I don’t think I’ve seen the sonic screwdriver in a while.

What a bunch of wankers! Mining other planets while people are alive on it.

Why do the stormtroopers shoot so high?

Part Three

:( K9 killed the falcon.

Part Four

YAR! Walk the plank ye doctor!

I like the Doctor’s little projector. I love that it just looks like a normal projector.

I also like the stormtrooper preemptively falling over in anticipation of those falling rocks.

Aww, Phil Spector is dead. At least he’ll be avenged, by grapthar’s hammer.