Tag Archives: William Shatner

O Canada

Not too long ago, a close friend of mine became a Canadian citizen. Today we celebrated that fact. I told her and her husband that I would provide the music for the party…

 

  1. Blue In Yr Eye – Amy Millan
  2. Snowbird – Anne Murray
  3. Neighborhood #1 (Tunnels) – The Arcade Fire
  4. The Power – Army Girls
  5. Sleepy Maggie – Ashley MacIsaac
  6. Tall Tall Shadow – Basia Bulat
  7. Two Girls From Montreal – The Bicycle
  8. Somebody Waits – Blue Rodeo
  9. Hasn’t Hit Me Yet – Blue Rodeo
  10. Anthems For A Seventeen Year Old Girl – Broken Social Scene
  11. Lovers In A Dangerous Time – Bruce Cockburn
  12. Pop Goes the World – The Burning Hell
  13. Golden Baby – Cœur de pirate
  14. Claire – Cuff The Duke
  15. Sold – Dan Mangan
  16. The Valley Town – Elliott Brood
  17. Assoholic – 54-40
  18. Highschool – The Flashing Lights
  19. It’s Not Safe – Gentleman Reg
  20. Outside Of Saskatoon – The Good Family
  21. Song For A Winter’s Night – Gordon Lightfoot
  22. Straight Up the Dial – Hooded Fang
  23. You Will Know – The Inbreds
  24. True Patriot Love – The Joel Plaskett Emergency
  25. A Case Of You – Joni Mitchell
  26. Raised On Robbery – Joni Mitchell
  27. I Woke Myself Up – Julie Doiron
  28. Crabbuckit – k-os
  29. If Rap Gets Jealous – K’naan
  30. Back to Me – Kathleen Edwards
  31. Never Had To Fight – Local Rabbits
  32. Let Your Backbone Slide – Maestro Fresh Wes
  33. Fil de soie – Marie-Pierre Arthur
  34. Echo Beach – Martha And The Muffins
  35. Cocaine Cowgirl – Matt Mays & El Torpedo
  36. Ages & Stages – The Meligrove Band
  37. Rockin’ In The Free World – Neil Young
  38. Pocahontas – Neil Young & Crazy Horse
  39. Mass Romantic – The New Pornographers
  40. Someone Who’s Cool – Odds
  41. Joy of Cooking – Old Man Luedecke
  42. Smells Like Teen Spirit – Paul Anka
  43. Scott Pilgrim – Plumtree
  44. 9 Piece Luggage Set – Radio Radio
  45. April Fools – Rufus Wainwright
  46. Edmonton – The Rural Alberta Advantage
  47. North Humberland West – The Sadies
  48. Possession – Sarah McLachlan
  49. Money City Maniacs – Sloan
  50. Everything You’ve Done Wrong – Sloan
  51. Underwhelmed – Sloan
  52. Home For A Rest – Spirit Of The West
  53. Northwest Passage – Stan Rogers
  54. Up And Running – The Super Friendz
  55. The Day We Hit The Coast – Thrush Hermit
  56. Life Is A Highway – Tom Cochrane
  57. Raise a Little Hell – Trooper
  58. D.D. – The Weeknd Trilogy
  59. Common People – William Shatner
  60. I Wasn’t Made For Fighting – Woodhands

Shit My Dad Says

Dear Mr. Shatner,
Thank you for those three years you performed on a television series called Star Trek.  You helped bring to life on of the most important television franchises in human history, and a very important part of my life. You see I’m a geek, and us geeks are really fond of Star Trek. Though it’s camp, cheesy, and over the top, it’s a series that was an important part of my childhood. Whether it was the campy original or the more serious spinoff.

Here you are now, in your old age, a retired Starfleet Captain1, who’s trying to (la)forge a relationship with his adult sons. Sure, I thought your only son, David, was killed by Doc Brown, but we all know that the Captain was a ladies’ man.

Okay, I’m going to stop pretending that this is part of the Star Trek universe.

Shit My Dad Says is pretty fucking bad. I will not refer to it as S#*! My Dad Says, because that’s just moronic, we’re in the 21st century, we can say the word shit on television. Sure, Shatner can be funny, but he’s neither enough of a straight man nor funny enough to be the lead in a sitcom. He’s not suited for the role. The dialogue is weak, it seems like the writers are just trying to cram in as many punchlines as they can, but they’re not funny.

There was only one mildly funny scene in the entire episode, that was when Shatner was at the Ministry renewing his licence. Even that wasn’t that funny.

In conclusion, if I want funny Shatner, I’ll just watch Star Trek IV The Voyage Home, or listen to his record Has Been.

  1. He was demoted from Admiral, see Star Trek IV. []

Governor General James T. Kirk

Friday morning’s Toronto Star had William Shatner on the cover, the former star of Star Trek, who has a fan movement on Facebook vying for him to be Governor General of Canada.

For those unfamiliar, the Governor General is the nation’s de facto head of state. While the monarch (currently Elizabeth II) is the actual head of state, she cannot perform those duties, as she is also the head of state for numerous other countries, and resides in the United Kingdom. Governors General provide a mostly symbolic role, they represent the nation on an international level, are a spokesperson for the country, sign bills into law (once they’ve passed through the Commons and Senate), dissolves parliament, calls elections and read the throne speech. For Americans this might be a strange thing as their head of government and head of state are within the same role, President. Most world nations divide the two roles.

Governors General are appointed by The Queen upon recommendation by her Prime Minister. Until 1952, Canadian Governors General were British Lords, Dukes, or Earls, with ties to the Royal Family. In 1952, Vincent Massey was appointed as the first Canadian Governor General of Canada. Currently Michaëlle Jean holds the position; a reporter who immigrated to Canada from Haiti, and is fluently bilingual, she possess the two qualities important in a Governor General, is fluently bilingual and is statesman-like.

William Shatner might be amazing, but he is not in any way statesman-like. Would Canada really want him representing us on an international stage? Sure, if we needed someone to Captain HMCS Enterprise1, he’d be the first one we’d call.

Does Shatner even speak French?

Leonard Cohen, however, is a much better choice. He’s a fluently bilingual artist, who is respected, not mocked. Cohen is very statesman-like, and could be the first Jewish head of states in Canada2. That is assuming we ignore the fact that he’s now an ordained Buddhist monk.

What’s most annoying about this entire thing is The Star’s reporting on it. Someone said, “it would be awesome if Shatner were Governor General. I’m gonna start a Facebook group.” People joined. Then the Toronto Star ran an article on the FRONT PAGE. Proof once again that newspapers are useless.

  1. Her Majesty’s Canadian Starship. []
  2. Have there been any outside of Israel? Benjamin Disraeli was Prime Minister of England back in the 19th century, but that’s head of government. []