Tag Archives: Rhys Williams

Doctor Who Story xx – Torchwood: Children of Earth

Tonight’s The Night

This is a mini-episode of Doctor Who that aired between “Planet of the Dead” and series 3 of Torchwood. Since it’s Jack in the TARDIS, I’m going to lump it in with Torchwood.

That was terrible, until David Tennant showed up.

Day One

It’s Malcolm fucking Tucker! Aka, the Doctor!

Rhys is always an asshole, even to children.

Does everyone in Cardiff know about Torchwood and what they do?

Those people in a hospital not wearing masks is wrong. I’m too surrounded by COVID.

The laser sutures should be commercialized.

Someone’s in Vancouver. Vancouver is great.

Would be so much better if Martha was able to be in the episode.

The new doctor1 reminds me of Matt Smith.

We. We. We. I need a wee!

If that happened at my place of employment, all the children stopping, screaming, saying “we are coming” over and over again, then them all resuming as normal, I honestly don’t think I’d blink an eye. Kids do weird things. Good thing Torchwood, UNIT, and Peter Capaldi are on the case.

“We need a child,” Jack, don’t say that to Ianto if you won’t admit you’re a couple.

Aww, it’s Jack’s daughter.

Jack is a complete asshole, asking his daughter to take his grandson for experimenting. Ianto and his niece.

Ianto’s brother in law’s a piece of shit.

Doesn’t the Torchwood car have a GPS?

Don’t give out your username and password. I really hope the civil service at the Home Office would know that, especially the secretary for the top civil servant (Deputy Minister? That’s what we would call that position in Canada. I think it’s Permanent Secretary in the United Kingdom after some very quick Googling) of the Home Office.

So more people have these laser sutures?

See, he gasps for air when he is resurrected, why didn’t he do that in Doctor Who?

Gwen should not have a baby!

Jack has a bomb in his belly. Cliffhanger time!

Capaldi is so sad.

Day Two

I don’t like this Prime Minister. He’s not willing to take responsibility, he’s more concerned about his job than he is about doing the right thing.

I didn’t notice last episode that there’s no opening credits anymore.

How did Gwen survive that sniper? Now I’m wondering how Ianto is surviving it.

Second reference to Canada.

Why are people honking at children stopped when they know this is not just kids hanging out and having a lark.

How did Ianto get that concrete block out of the building? That doesn’t really make sense

Day Three

I thought Jack would be into tracksuit bottoms.

God! Russell Davies, stop with the news broadcasts!

Why would someone leave their kids with a couple of people who just had police barge into their house with guns. I wouldn’t do that.

Why did you step out of your car to take a phone call and leave the keys in the ignition?

Jack’s daughter is an idiot.

Jack should change his outfit. Seriously, it’s time to stop wearing that stupid outfit.

I think they think Torchwood are the good guys, they’re not.

The 456 needs to learn to use their words. “Speak” “I am speaking” “We will speak” Why the fuck didn’t you just say that?

It makes no sense for civil servants to negotiate, and if the US government wants the president there, they can approve the room with haste.

He says “the Provinces and Territories of Canada” as if that’s the name of Canada. It’s simply Canada. Third mention in three episodes.

Day Four

12 children for millions of lives seems reasonable.

Ianto, he’s lived hundreds of years, you expect him to tell you everything he’s done?

Jack’s daughter reminds me of the actress who played Susan, Carole Ann Ford, in Doctor Who.

This is a big enough issue, Martha might be on her honeymoon (if UNIT hasn’t recalled her already) and she has the Doctor’s phone number. Call him.

“Thanks everyone, let’s take a break.” I don’t think that’s a time to take a break.

What did Jack really expect. The aliens had biological warfare, there’s only one on Earth and they have no idea where the rest are. How are they possibly going to fight? Jack is 100% responsible for Ianto’s death, plus all the other deaths in Thames House.

Day Five

Oh, I remember what the children hooked up to the aliens look like, the Toclafane.

The US government has no authority to override the UK government on UK soil.

UNIT sends a colonel to talk to the 456, and not a General? Or even the Brigadier?

Really? It’s about drugs? Yikes.

Why are they telling all this information to Alice?

The “nice kids are safe.” I don’t think they understand how systematic racism would be a part of this and I think “Children of Earth” really really loses a lot because it doesn’t address this.

Keep your vest on, Officer Andy!

Alice, don’t leave your child with a stranger in these times!

This was a horrible resolution to this story.

Governments the world over should fall because of what they did. The UK government at the very least. It had gone much too far for status quo to continue.

The careers of Doctor Who prime ministers is very short.

“You can not run away.” “Yes I can, just watch me.” There’s another reference to Canada.

  1. Not that kind of doctor []